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Monday, May 21, 2007

My "Other" Husband

Yes, that's right, my other husband. I, like many Americans, have an "office spouse". I know I mention coworker S. often, but I've never really talked much about him. He's actually my second office husband - my first left for greener pastures; we still keep in touch and the former/current spouses make jokes at my expense, of course!

I hadn't planned on making coworker S. my office spouse - it just sort of happened. We have the same job and work together a lot. We enjoy talking about current events, we both enjoy elements of pop culture and we both like SNL (more vintage, like pre-2000). It's an easy relationship to maintain - a successful office marriage knows its boundaries, and we have no problem staying within them. We're friends and coworkers who are working toward common goals and facing the same obstacles each day. Hell I see him more than I see my REAL husband, Karl. We have a lot of inside jokes and good times, but we also like to push each other's buttons and squabble now and then, just like any relationship. We've definitely got each other's back - but we also tell each other like it is.

There's plenty of advantages to an office spouse. There's no dating woes or spending money on each other. There's no putting your best face forward at all times to create the right impression. We don't have to go home with each other at the end of the day... and there's no fighting about typical marriage crap (bills, kids, chores). It's especially nice to have someone in the office I trust implicitly, personally and professionally.

What does my Karl think of my office husband? He is very aware and has no issues whatsoever. They've met, which helps to demystify the relationship (see bottom of the article below, "Secrets to a Successful Office Marriage"). I think Karl actually appreciates it - I never, ever, bring work home with me. I've already vented it all out with the office husband before I get home!

Do you or have you ever had an office spouse? Here's a good article I read on it.


Vegas Princess said...

I had an office spouse at my other job and it was wonderful. But I do not have one at the job I have now and I think I need one because I am stressing out. But all the guys I work with are sports guys and not interested in talking with agirl. Plus they are all younger than me so it is hard for me to find someone.

I loved the article because the people in it were from Natick and Newton...right near where I grew up. In fact I know the compnay they talked about.

Ken said...

At my last job, I had a series of office spouses. Before I left, I had two at the same time. We all shared a workspace and it was nice - we were able to commiserate with each other about various ills in the organization.

When you work out of your house though, it's a lot harder. I think my cat Midge is my work spouse now. How sad is that?

An80sNut said...

No, I work with too many guys. It'd be like an office commitment or something and... it think my stomach is turning on that thought.

ScrapAddictNV said...

Ahh, the other spouse. Yes, I'm certain Ruben has one or two that keep him in line at work, and while I mostly worked in an office setting with other women who tend to be bitch, catty, and backstabbing, it did make it difficult for finding myself an office spouse. We had a lot of techs, but I don't know if I would call any my spouse persay, I had one Ruben would call my boyfriend. He was my go to man for the computer goods, he could get me a hack for a serial number or burn me a program I wanted. Still to this day I can ask him for anything just about and he somehow finds it. All I had to do was correct any errors on his paperwork so he didn't get in trouble with the boss man. He was a good friend to have around and I do miss that aspect of working, however, Ruben brought it to my attention the other night when we were discussing my upcoming boob-job (yes I am finally undergoing reconstruction this summer, I am also have the other one removed and replaced with an implant - I mean why stop at 1 implant, why not have 2?) Any who, I'm saying how I can't wait to wear v-necks again and out of no-where he makes this comment about yeah the guys at work really used to enjoy the view. I asked what he meant and he said he heard from several people back then that all the guys would like to swing by my office to take a look down my shirt. He refused to tell me who would say such a thing, but now that I think about it it does explain why we always had so many guys hanging out at my office when they were off the clock. Never realized I put on such a show. Guess that also how they managed to raise nearly $300 for me to buy me a gift card when they heard I had breast cancer - maybe they all started feeling guilty.
But I'm all for Ruben having someone at the office keeping him inline. I even told them to feel free to smack him around some if he acts up, even though he is their boss. Work spouses are good for a marriage, but I am missing out since I no longer work, so I have what I call my laptop spouse. I'm connected all day just about, sometimes just staring at the screen for hours doing nothing.....it's called BOREDOM but it sure beats stress.

BeckEye said...

I've had several office husbands over the years. They're a necessity!

Nik said...

I don't work with anyone who's worthy enough to even be an office husband. There are some guys I get along with, but there's no way I could be in an office relationship with them. They're way too needy.

I'm glad you have such an awesome relationship with your office hubby though. It's always have someone to keep ya in line. Oh and more power to Karl for appreciating your relationship.

Layla (aka Barbara) said...

Hey! How come you get two husbands and I don’t even have one! No fair! I don’t know if I’ve ever had an office husband but I’ve been very close with several male bosses (in totally appropriate ways) and still have lunch with one of them every month, his wife is okay with it. I admire couples that have that kind of trust because I have seen plenty of married people fool around at the office and the spouse at home had no idea. But I know for a fact that men and women can be platonic friends.

Meow said...

I had an office spouse when i worked full time in another life. It was a great relationship, just like you describe.
Hope all is well with you Lora.
Take care, Meow