I think it's safe to say we've all done it... Googled old friends, coworkers, even old boyfriends/girlfriends - maybe you've even looked them up on Facebook or MySpace. Maybe you're just curious what they're up to, maybe you want to reconnect in some fashion, or maybe you just want to see how kind the years have been? Likely, in some cases, all of the above.
I've touched on this topic today with several different people, and I've gotten some very different answers... so I thought I'd see what other answers I might get. I was going to ask if you'd actually looked up an old flame, but I doubt I'll get many honest answers, LOL. So let me get all hypothetical on your ass. IF you found an old flame on the internet (to include photos), and the years were very unkind to them (they'd let themselves go, have bad skin now, a combover, whatever), how would that make you feel? Would you:
a) Think Karma caught up with them and have a giggle
b) Not think anything of it, who cares
c) Think that it reflects on you somehow, i.e. they represent your past dating choices and therefore should have kept themselves presentable
d) Feel pity toward them, what a shame
e) Other (please explain)
Now I know we're not all so shallow to wish ill on others. I'm talking your gut reaction - the first thing that pops in your head. It's human nature, I think, to have that fleeting thought! Doesn't mean you necessarily judge from the picture alone.
I've touched on this topic today with several different people, and I've gotten some very different answers... so I thought I'd see what other answers I might get. I was going to ask if you'd actually looked up an old flame, but I doubt I'll get many honest answers, LOL. So let me get all hypothetical on your ass. IF you found an old flame on the internet (to include photos), and the years were very unkind to them (they'd let themselves go, have bad skin now, a combover, whatever), how would that make you feel? Would you:
a) Think Karma caught up with them and have a giggle
b) Not think anything of it, who cares
c) Think that it reflects on you somehow, i.e. they represent your past dating choices and therefore should have kept themselves presentable
d) Feel pity toward them, what a shame
e) Other (please explain)
Now I know we're not all so shallow to wish ill on others. I'm talking your gut reaction - the first thing that pops in your head. It's human nature, I think, to have that fleeting thought! Doesn't mean you necessarily judge from the picture alone.
2 comments:
Well I can tell you that when I had discovered an ex of mine on Facebook and found out he was living in Ireland with a wife and new baby, I felt like someone had hit me in the gut. On one hand I wanted him to be miserable because he made me miserable. but on the other hand, that was supposed to be MY life. I had always talked about living in England or Ireland. So in a way I felt betrayed and jealous and a bit sad. Not because I wanted to be with him, but because he had gone ahead with something I had talked about. Whether on purpose or not I felt like it was a jab at me. But I am delusional and self-centered so that is probably why.
I recently found an old friend on line, not even a boyfriend, and the years had not exactly been kind. My first reaction was, "Wholy $h*t!" Then I thought, that is what ya get for all those time you gave me crap about this diet or that that I was on, and I laughed out loud. Then i stared thinking about that maybe he has had health issues or something. Lots of thoughts, nothing concrete though. I guess a mix of emotions, like VP that were about me, but then I thought about it more, stepped away from it and realized it is his life, not mine. Best of luck, buddy.
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